The Peak Of Billy Ocean

For mine, the brilliant music career of Billy Ocean started at the top and went down from there. I'll grant you that songs like 'Caribbean Queen', 'When The Going Gets Tough, The Tough Get Going' & 'Get Outta My Dreams, Get Into My Car' are pretty good tunes, but to paraphrase Sick Boy: "They are merely blips on an otherwise downward trajectory".

To fully appreciate the genius of Billy Ocean, you can look no further than his debut single from 1976. Everything else that followed was shite in comparison.

Recognise fools:

A Retraction of Soundtracktion

In the interests of full and frank disclosure, my iPod has brought it to my attention that I do own more than one soundtrack album, something I vehemently denied a few days ago.

Not soon after watching the film Once at the cinemas last year I went out and purchased its brilliant soundtrack.

I humbly apologise for misleading you in my previous (and rather rash) post.

As a peace offering, I give you the following:



Friends again?

I don't get no respect! Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk

Take That, Shaggy, Deep Blue Something? Sorry but if someone says 'name your favourite pop songs of 1995' I go straight for these 2 gems. Say what you will about my choices but I will take them over 'Boombastic' and 'Breakfast at Fucking Tiffanys' any day of the week. Both songs received only scant play on radio but I enjoyed what little attention they did receive. The two bands had already had their big moments in the sun back in the late 80s/early 90s so to score big again after such a long time away was asking for far too much.

Still...

'Over My Shoulder' by Mike & The Mechanics



and 'Come Back' by Londonbeat

The best U2 song you haven't heard/Soundtracktion

First and foremost, the above song 'The Ground Beneath Her Feet' is the fookin' bollocks (why do I always take on the persona of Noel Gallagher when I write?). Mercifully tacked on to the end of All That You Can't Leave Behind it was originally from the soundtrack to the heavily criticised film The Million Dollar Hotel. Despite being a big fan of U2, I am yet to see the film nor do I own its soundtrack, but I have already spoken at length elsewhere in cyberspace about the commitment of being a fan so let's move on to the real reason for this post.

When's the last time you bought a soundtrack album? I thought so.

I currently own one album of songs from or inspired by a film. Just the one. That honour goes to the music from Into The Wild, a film I am also yet to see (due to laziness on my behalf) and was only bought without first listening to it because I thought it would be great to hear an Eddie Vedder solo album.

It wasn't.

The two best songs on the album are covers versions ('Hard Sun' and 'Society') while the rest feel like half finished works. Perhaps I might gain a better appreciation of the music once I get around to watching the film but for now let me use it as solid evidence to prove my point: I care little for soundtracks.

Before my rash decision to purchase Into The Wild, I had already discarded the two other soundtracks I had ever owned: Empire Records and Space Jam. Empire Records I admit I still miss because it had that great song by Gin Blossoms, but Space Jam is unforgivable and my only defence is that it was purchased during those heady couple of months when the Quad City DJ's were cool.

These days music for films (Tarantino's works aside) have become particularly uninspiring, whether they be songs created especially for the movie or older songs compiled by some bright spark at the studio (Every 10th romantic comedy must include 'Someone Like You'). In fact it has been television shows like The Sopranos and Life On Mars (UK Version) that have led the way with their impressive song selection more so than their Silver Screen cousins.

So is there hope for me buying a soundtrack in the future? Better selection of music would be a big first step but I doubt it would sway my opinion. I guess it comes down to enjoying the particular songs with the visual.

Perfect example: 'Free Falling', to me, will always be associated with the following:



Tom Cruise opinions aside, that song loses its lustre when heard on a soundtrack with other songs that aren't sung by Tom Petty.

For me it is the complete package or nothing at all.

The Greatest Song Of All Time - Official

After months of deliberations by a panel of experts, it has been declared that the following is officially the greatest song in the history of recorded music:



This author can confirm that, despite its title, the song is not about him.

With glowing hearts we see thee rise

Recent events have made me think about High School. Not in a nostalgic, Big Chill, kind of a way (God forbid) but more of a jeez I'm acting like I would if I was in High School kind of a way. Now being 27 years of age, that would be fine if I was starring in a teen drama. But seems I missed out on a role in the relaunched 90210, then that shit ain't cool.

Now I was an awkward kid growing up (sources close to me will argue that little has changed) but I can look back on my silly antics with some sense of humour because really it is what makes me the person I am today (for better or worse).

Only I could think that slow dancing to 'Please Forgive Me' by Bryan Adams with my girlfriend would be the height of romanticism, despite the fact that it was at a school run disco...in the middle of the day...in the multi-purpose shelter. Throw in the fact she soon ditched me because she had eyes for my good friend (or so I was told) and it really is a memory one would rather forget.

Keep in mind it was 1993 and I had just become a teen so you can cut me a little slack.

The same can't be said for the time that I thought the best way into a girl's heart was to buy her a thoughtful present for her 16th Birthday. Unfortunately that thoughtful gift was Alanis Morissette's Jagged Little Pill - the most man hating album of the 90s. Suffice to say the girl did not become mine.

Perhaps I'm not to blame. Perhaps it has to do with the fact that both Bryan and Alanis are Canadian. It is their Canadianess that has made these moments turn into a junior version of Curb Your Enthusiasm, not my lack of suaveness.

I knew there was a reason I fucking hated Tal Bachman.

From now on I am done with the Canadians. I am deleting my Martha Wainwright albums from my iPod and am never watching my DVD of The Last Waltz by The Band ever again. Except for the Van Morrison chapter when they perform 'Caravan'. That's the bomb.

My collection of records by The Tea Party? Gone. That one semi-popular album by The Watchmen? Farewell. Arcade Fire? As much as it pains me.

Time to get this bilingual speaking monkey off my back once and for all.

Now I'm acting my age.